How's Your Sports Season Going? Navigating the Tough Questions During the Holidays

The holidays are coming up and family get-togethers are quickly approaching. This time of year can be both exciting and stressful for athletes. While the holidays allow you to reconnect with your friends and family, they also bring questions about your life, your sport, and how your season has been. If things haven't gone as planned, whether you didn't get enough playing time, didn't perform the way you hoped, or even missed out on opportunities, it can make you feel uncomfortable.

But why does a simple question like "How's your season going?" have the power to trigger discomfort, disappointment, or even frustration?

To answer this, we need to talk about athletic identity.

The Athletic Identity

An athlete's identity is often shaped and developed around their involvement in sports. Many athletes develop an athletic identity that becomes so strong that they start to view themselves primarily as athletes, to the detriment of other aspects of their identities (Beamon, 2012; Carless & Douglas, 2013; Webb, Nasco, Riley & Headrick, 1998).

To pursue their dreams of attending college or a professional career, athletes frequently devote their entire being to training, competition, and performance. This singular focus can result in an identity that revolves almost entirely around their athletic achievements (Cosh, Crabb & Tully, 2015; Foster & Huml, 2017). Having a strong athletic identity can give you an advantage as it pushes you to dedicate yourself to your sport (Hollings, Mallett & Hume, 2014).

The problem arises when an athlete’s performance doesn’t align with their expectations or when they face setbacks, leaving them feeling like their entire identity is at risk. This can lead them to experiencing difficult emotions when their performance falls short, feeling like they are not enough, or that their worth is tied only to what they accomplish on the field (Cosh, Crabb & Tully, 2015; Foster & Huml, 2017). This happens when an athlete's athletic identity takes dominance over all other facets of their identity to the point where it dictates how they view themselves.

Understanding the Root of Your Discomfort

So this holiday season, if you find yourself feeling uncomfortable when asked about your sport, it may be due to an identity threat. Athletes often experience identity threats when their self-concept is challenges, such as when their performance doesn't meet their expectations (Chun, Wendling & Sagas, 2023).

It's important to realise that this discomfort does not imply that you are not enough or unworthy. It simply indicates that your athletic identity is being challenged, which is a common experience for many athletes, particularly during difficult seasons.

How to Prepare for Those Holiday Questions

One way to cope with these uncomfortable questions is by broadening your sense of self beyond your athletic or performance identity. Although your sport plays a major part in who you are, it is not the only part. You are more than your sport.

Take some time to reflect on who you are beyond your sport. What other identities do you hold? Do you have hobbies that aren't related to your sport? Are you a friend, a student, a sibling, or a creative person? Take the time to acknowledge who you are when you are not training or competing.

Another way to deal with these uncomfortable situations is to refocus the conversation. Instead of fixating on what you have or haven't achieved, you can choose to highlight what you've learned throughout your journey, how you've grown as an individual, and any new skills or interests you've developed along the way. This approach not only takes the pressure off the need to justify or explain your results, but it also broadens the narrative around what it means to be an athlete.

Being an athlete isn't just about the final outcome or the scoreboard, it is about the process of growth, resilience, and self-improvement. Even if you didn't achieve the exact results you wanted, every training sessions, every challenge, and every setback offers valuable lessons that contributed to your development as an athlete and as a person.

Lastly, don't forget to ask for help. In many ways, this time of year can be difficult. Make sure you are surrounded by people who can assist you overcome these challenging times and remind you of who you are.

References

Beamon, K. (2012). “I’m a Baller”: Athletic Identity Foreclosure among African-American Former Student-Athletes. Journal of African American Studies, 16(2), 195–208.

Carless, D., Douglas, K. (2013). “In the boat” but “selling myself short”: Stories, narratives, and identity development in elite sport. Sport Psychology, 27, 27–39.

Chun, Y., Wendling, E., & Sagas, M. (2023). Identity Work in Athletes: A Systematic Review of the Literature. Sports, 11(10), 203.

Cosh, S., Crabb, S., Tully, P.J. (2015). A champion out of the pool? A discursive exploration of two Australian Olympic swimmers’ transition from elite sport to retirement. Psychology of Sport and Exercise, 19, 33–41.

Foster, S. J. L., & Huml, M. R. (2017). The Relationship Between Athletic Identity and Academic Major Chosen by Student-Athletes. International journal of exercise science, 10(6), 915–925.

Hollings, S. C., Mallett, C. J., & Hume, P. A. (2014). The Transition from Elite Junior Track-and-Field Athlete to Successful Senior Athlete: Why Some Do, Why others Don’t. International Journal of Sports Science & Coaching, 9(3), 457-471.

Webb, W. M., Nasco, S. A., Riley, S., & Headrick, B. (1998). Athlete identity and reactions to retirement from sports. Journal of Sport Behavior, 21(3), 338–362.